Collect the Golden Moments

Collect the golden moments, guard them as the precious things they are, write them down, speak of them often, and remember them. Hold them tightly.

I react very badly to inspirational quotes. They make me want to commit grievous acts.

This is not quite a biblical quote, nor is it an inspirational poster or piece of artwork from any modern day equivalent of Athena.

It’s a bit of advice that I got from a friend.

Remembering the golden moments is an act of self-care and survival.

It’s also fun.

Some people count their children’s achievements in terms of GCSES, A Levels, goals scored, ballet moves mastered, and whether they’ve had offers from both Oxford and Cambridge.

We use a different system.

Our system is called ‘Did anything good happen?’.

‘Anything at all?’

The whole day doesn’t have to be better.

In fact, you may have lurched from unmitigated disaster to unmitigated disaster.

But if one tiny tiny positive happened, grab it, and focus on it.

The positive may even be ‘the absence of complete and utter chaos’.

Our house has a porch. We used to use it for prams, buggies, scooters and wellington boots. It is now used almost exclusively to store Amazon parcels.

For example, on this very day, in fact, just now, The Little Man answered the door to The Amazon Delivery Person.

He took the package and said thank you.

He didn’t hold eye contact, or shake hands or become life long friends, but this was undeniably an interaction with a ‘stranger’.

And perhaps of even greater significance, he told me and my wife, individually, with undoubted pride in his voice, and a small grin on his face, what he’d just done.

What a great moment.

He’s been with us exactly 8 years.

He’s 14.

We went to the same sweet shop every Friday after school. It only took about 5 years for The Little Man to feel confident enough to buy his own crisps ‘from the lady‘. He chose Pickled Onion Space Raiders. We were so proud.

Published by

fosteringandadoptionwithphil

Birth parent, Foster Carer, Adopter and Recruiter of Foster Carers for Liverpool City Council

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s